What does it mean to be mature?
My ego wants me to believe that I am mature. From adolescence, others would say that I was “mature for my age” and it led me to believe that I was endowed with some great wisdom that others my age had not yet attained.
In truth, I have not fully developed or reached an advanced stage of mental and emotional development. What I have discovered is that I am constantly maturing or evolving.
In the past I thought the process was complete; that I had all the answers that others did not. Yet, maturity is critical in the development of my character and what I give to others.
People perceive your level of competence, discipline, and integrity as a measure of your maturity.
Maturity is how I behave when I am alone. It is how I act when the camera of others is not viewing me. This is why maturity is not a final product, rather a process of constant and never ending growth.
My character displayed to others needs to be consistent in how I live my life. I cannot share to others about sobriety if I am dishonest and sneak drinks when others are not looking. The truth will always be revealed.
Long term sobriety has given me a clarity of thought the longer I distanced myself from that last drink. The culmination of these years is not as important, as to how I demonstrate my sobriety to others today.
Sobriety means being considerate, intelligent, and caring towards yourself and others. I know many people who have much more time than me and that is fantastic. Yet, many do not have the wisdom or maturity or humility to recognize that all we really have is one day of sobriety. That day is today.
From this moment forward I do not have to have another drink, if I decide to release the ego, and understand that I am only given a daily reprieve based on the maintenance of my spiritual condition. Yes, spiritual condition.
Self will, for many years I believed would keep me sober. I was wrong. I needed to experience one of life’s great paradoxes. I needed to surrender in order to win the battle of alcoholism. It is not only my decision to keep me sober, but a higher relationship with the Divine.
Many call the Divine Source, God or Creator of the Universe. Some scientists refer to it as energy, frequency, vibration, power, order, or whatever your current understanding is.
The concept or idea is irrelevant. The level of trust in the power gives it power. The strength of belief or faith is the catalyst.
My maturity is knowing that I don’t have to know what this Spirit energy is, only to know that it is there, and not only running my life, but other lives as well. I have developed a degree of faith that is stronger than trust, because I have experienced and seen others experience the miracle of sobriety from past lives of destruction, fear, desperation, and no hope.
Now armed with the knowledge that I am not a finished product and am continually willing and open to learn more about myself, I can better understand others. I am a perpetual student even though I can teach.
In a spirit of humility, maturity for me means balancing courage and consideration. I might have great courage, yet not be considerate of others feelings or attitudes. I might be too considerate, and not have the courage to set boundaries.
Today, I will not let others walk in my mind with dirty feet. What I mean is I can be empathetic, kind, listening, and supporting, however, I can or will not let others negativity or pain effect what I truly value today and that is serenity.
I no longer try to hold on to resentments which lead to anger and was the number cause of why I drank. I had to let them go and surrender to the understanding that we are all at different levels or stages of growth, experience, and understanding. Once this discovery was made, my maturity is at a stable fertile place.
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